I've waited for you so long and finally you came....but dead

LIHIM (secret)

the music that i never thought existed until I met you. whenever i hear and listen to this song, i see you. I remember you... the song was old but still nothing compares to a thousand lyrics created. this song was once dedicated to me and it turned to be best dedicated for you. as we close and open our eyes every day, our secrets continue and will end when we are end. still, thanks to you. I miss you

just another soothing concept for Canon

its just making me more in love with the music. its like making me think i'm just having an ordinary day while walking. or just a fine rainy day, sitting on my sofa with one hot cup of coffee.

Canon

the music that i never realized was good before...i heard this first time but it was just nothing to me. the second time i heard it is when you're in the picture. every time i hear it and listen to it, it was us. i remember us. i may be exaggerate but nothing compares to this music. if you can feel how i feel every time i listen to this. if you can only see what i see in my mind..all the things from the start. the thought of you lying down next to me. sleeping safe and sound without worrying for tomorrow coz we know we still have each other. that no one and nothing's gonna stop us. every time I'm down, stressed, sad....it turns me up and smiling and make me forget all the trouble I've been through when i hear the music.. you know its not all about the music itself...but the memories i still consider my treasure. one day if i found someone....I'd be proud sharing what we've been through and how we loved each other. i won't ask you to do the same....but i hope that even just one day, you felt how much i love you and how much true i am to you. we ended up bad...but when i think of you..i smile. our love was covered with threat..but when i think of you, i see your smile. our mind were threatened by trust...but when i think of you, i see your smile when you see me smiling. and I'm smiling because no matter how bad they see me, you accepted me.

I'm happy, and I can be happier

I met an old friend one time...I remembered, how that person treated me well before, but it was in the wrong place and in the wrong time. We met again after few years without communication. I can't help but to reminisce the first day we've known each other. Together with those memories are the other people who became part of me. I asked myself..Ba't ganon, no matter how hard you tried to have each of those person of your life to stay with you, no matter how you sacrificed your dignity and everything in exchange for them to stay, they won't.

Some of them wants to retrieve the treasure we had but at those crucial times, I can't give myself anymore. But when it turned to be that i needed someone, none of them are there for me.

That's why I agreed that on every relationship, no matter if its friendship or lovers, or family, they're like sand. You can't have them all no matter how hard you tried to hold on to them, only some will stay. The more you grip the more you will lose them and the more you open your hands, the more you lose them as well. So just hold on for some, enough that you can grip properly. And learn to let go. By then, it will easy for you to step up and walk on your life again. Kase hindi nga pwedeng lahat mag-stay.

I also learned to be thankful still even we've gone through to a not so good parting timjs or separation or break ups because without those people, you won't feel the happiness you're looking for. Its just that no one and nothing is permanent that's why we lose anything even everything.

I listened to a DJ on the radio last night when I was in the Bus riding towards to work....He was talking to a lady caller sharing her story regarding his boyfriend. They're talking about losing a relationship. The DJ said that, "Be loved by who you are and what you have. No matter how careless you are or even you do things against your bf's will, he will still love you because he loves you and he loves you because its you. On the other hand, no matter how you sacrificed, even you do and give everything to the person you love, if he/she really wants to destroy you, fool you, cheat on you, he/she will have the determination and courage to do that..and lie hard." That's a good advice though. After that i just smiled. Life is tough and is tougher if you're weak and does not know how to handle your self. Life is bigger than anything on this world but don't forget that you hold on your life, its you who carries it. So, You'll still have the biggest hands to protect it, empower it, and take care of it..

and with an old friend that i met again, i spare a little time and to those good people who still stay. I promised to myself not to deprive myself again for giving time for those people who appreciates little things from me.  and for those who not, i don't hate them..in fact I want them to stay. For what reason, because they have they're own life to deal with. This world is not mine anyway, this is for everyone. Things are in their proper places and i think this is one of the reasons why I'm happy with my life now.

Thanks to you

This day is special for me. If you'll ask me why, let me just answer it this way, every person has their own special day..for whatever reason. Nagkataon pang Sunday and its a mother's day. I don't know how to express my heart full of thanksgiving and happiness and I'm really happy for what's happening to me right now. If only I could gather all the people of my life to spend even just a little time with them...to say thank you...sorry...forgive me...and I love them. Why? nothing! Its just what and how I feel today and  think whatever I'm feeling right now is good. I know for a fact that this is not permanent but, at least a day in my life, it happened.

So much for this, I want to right something for my mom. We never talk that much, see that much. My time for work is her time to take her rest. Her time going to work is my time for rest. I never know, how she feels as our mom. We never had the chance to talk bout our life. I Love You Mom. I love you and thank you. Its an endless thank you and appreciation for you bringing me to life with the Lord's blessings. Happy Mother's day to you. Lord take good care of my mom and all of the Mother in the world.

metaphor

son..be like a gentle wind even the storm is dark and heavy. be like the grass that dances gracefully with the breeze. be like a bamboo that knows how to bend so you  won't break and crash. be like a candle that lights up the darkest corner at best effort even if there are flashlights better than you....it means giving your best shot. be like a child having a good soul. be like an animal who knows how to defend theirself. be like a dime, precious than a diamond. be like a winner, even if all else fails. that's how you should live your life.  that's how a happy life is

you're not impossible

heal my heart and make it clean